One of the first girls to help me with this project was Rebecca Myers. Rebecca was one of my favorites from the start. She was very into judo and wrestling and was one of the biggest contributors to my first wrestling group.
Rebecca was no superstar on the mats, her size made her an underdog in most of her matches against boys. She was only 4’9. However she made varsity her junior year at the 103 pound weight class. She ended up winning only two non forfeit victories vs. boys, but there are plenty of girls who win zero matches.
Rebeccca was so into girls wrestling, that in 2008 she started to write a short fictional story on it. This is all important information because it shows just how much passion Rebecca had during her high school years for the sport. But passion isn’t always a good thing. Sometimes passion brings intelligence, and intelligence isn’t always a good thing. In wrestling, ignorance can be bliss.
Many of the frustrating moments writing this book is the girls attitude and thoughts when going against male opponents. When I was their age and had to face a boy in tennis, I didn’t have his stats readily available, and we normally never met each other beforehand. Now with facebook, many wrestlers know of other wrestlers in their weight class, and know who the “beasts” are. I never wanted to know my opponent, unless I knew I was better than them. Because I didn’t want to be intimidated before a match.
Many girls are naturally intimidated by any boy simply because boys are “the stronger sex.” Yes, boys are typically stronger but that doesn’t have to be the case, and quite often, its not. But even when a girl dominates boy, the girl think its all technique, when sometimes its strength. I’ve seen lots of videos and pictures of well defined girls beating lanky boys. But the girls get it in their head they are weaker.
Rebecca was one of the girls, which in my opinion knew too much. In the group she’d debate about which male college wrestling programs are the best. Her love for the sport was both a positive and negative. But before her senior year her coach told her something that she needed to hear. "I think you've got the strength and technique to start turning some guys. If you go crazy, you should start winning. No one from beginner to decent should beat you." Before Rebecca’s senior year she told me, “So many people drill into our heads that girls cant wrestle, that soon we believe them.”
Fast forward to 2012, and Rebecca messaged me about a match she wanted me to write about. Rebecca beat the boy, months before she actually wrestled him. This is the story, of how if you just believe in yourself, you will prevail.
Rebecca competed in a local wrestling club run by athletes and coaches from one of the best collegiate teams in the country, Cornell. She says, “During one practice, a coach from Newark Valley, a local high school team was attending to help out and to coach a few of his wrestlers. He came over to speak with me, asked me how my season was going, and told me about his team’s 103-pounder who “didn’t stand a chance.”
A little while later, Rebecca was at a dual meet tournament, when she was scheduled to face the boy from Newark Valley, and her eyes lit up. “When I began warming up for my match, I remember thinking, ‘This kid’s coach doesn’t even believe he can win. I won’t let him win.” The 4’9 girl was no longer the picked on, she was the bully.
The wrestlers went in for the handshake, and Rebecca’s confidence only grew. “As soon as I felt his weak handshake, I knew he was scared. I was thinking I had to win this match. It was mine already.” Rebecca loved being the hunter instead of the hunted.
“Honestly, I was pumped. Usually when I wrestled, I hesitated off the whistle and waited for my opponent to make a move. But this time I didn’t hesitate. I knew I could plow through this guy. I tied him up as fast as I could and went to work.”
While the boy did a decent job sprawling, it was Rebecca who was taking all the shots. She took him down “quite a few times” and rode tough on top. Rebecca says, “It felt amazing to be dominating my opponent. It was easy for me to break him down and keep him from escaping. I’ve always had problems being aggressive, but this match I didn’t.”
But it wasn’t all glory for Rebecca. “I was frustrated I didn’t pin him in the first period. I wanted to pin him as fast as I could. But I was determined to dominate the second period as I had the first.” And she did. This time, the boy would not escape Rebecca’s pinning attempts, as she ended up on top of him, and the ref slapped the mat for the pin. Rebecca felt satisfied. “I set out to pin him and I was really proud I did. I proved to myself that my attitude mattered a lot.”
Rebecca ads “Don’t get me wrong, the boy was very strong. But I set the tempo, I controlled the positions, I dominated the match.”
Rebecca says that she wished she could go through all her competitions with this mind set. “Of course I wish I had this attitude before. After this match, when I wrestled guys I had never seen before, thinking of this match helped. And as cheesy as it sounds, confidence is key. And that confidence can come from almost anywhere, even the opposing team’s coach!”
It’s a lesson, I hope future girls listen to. Because if more girls believed they could compete, and beat boys, they would.
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